TLV — inbox.

[nrpi]

Comments

he is absolutely texting when they are literally in the next rooms

[betacuck]

Hey, you're welcome by the way.

[nrpi]

For what?

[betacuck]

Saving the Roy family name while you do your best impression of a blobfish.

I'm getting a hand on the black market business, so any time you want to finally admit I'm your favourite I'll gladly loop you in.

[nrpi]

I wouldn't say that getting involved in the black market is saving the family name dude.

[betacuck]

Fuck you, I don't see you doing anything. Dad would lose his mind over how smart I'm being.

My point is there's a really fruity English twink who's got a pretty good hold on the ship's balls, so I figure I can learn whatever I can from him and then bam. Usurp. Or edge him out. Or have him under us. Or something.

text;

[betacuck]

You met Captain Hook yet?

[nrpi]

The British guy with the man bun?

[betacuck]

Bingo. He try to kick your ass?

[nrpi]

No?

[ What the fuck, Roman. ]

I just tried to explain spaceflight to him. I don't know if he got it cause it kinda seemed like he's older than the concept of indoor plumbing but whatever.

Did he try to kick yours??

text;

[betacuck]

I'm literally going to kill myself.

[nrpi]

You don't like this Raylan guy then?

[betacuck]

He's not even a real human being. He has a Blackberry.

[nrpi]

Sucks for you dude

Couple hours after pairings

[littletonoidea]

[God this is so weird.]

Hey, uh...

...soooooo...

Looks like. I'm your warden, for uh. For now. I promise I won't go full Hartman on you, this isn't gonna be a like. I say jump you say how high [In a markedly exhausted mimicry of the scene - actually, he sounds tired the whole time he talks.] sort of arrangement. Honestly I have no idea why the Admiral thought I was worthy of a position of ultimate power, but. Well? Here we are.

[nrpi]

[ Okay. Extremely weird. Kendall's actually avoided this so far on account of whatever the fuck happened in Flotilla, so this is his first exposure to what is definitely an incredibly awkward situation. Apart from with his brother, Kendall hasn't actually had to reckon with the fact that he's here as an inmate. Like, as in a prisoner. A criminal. At least this guy seems to be as weirded out as Kendall is. ]

Uh – cool.

[ Excellent job. ]

Sorry, uh. This is weird for me too.

[littletonoidea]

Hey, I was still in the infirmary when this fun fact dropped. [There's a light chuckle in his tired voice.] I've had a forty-eight hour turnaround from Chuck Noland to John Cawley and I am so not prepared for this.

I dunno if you wanna meet up and... I dunno, have a chat over the water cooler or something, see where we stand on this whole thing?

[nrpi]

Sure. Yeah, alright, that sounds... [ Not fun, exactly. ] Yeah. [ But before they can talk about the best place to meet face to face, he's gotta know. ] Uh – why... were you in the infirmary?

text;

[betacuck]

I talked to your warden Baguette btw

[nrpi]

Oh yeah?

I talked to your warden John Wayne.

What did you guys talk about?

[betacuck]

hey stud
lunch date?

[nrpi]

What's on the menu?

[betacuck]

how the fuck should i know

[ roman you work in the kitchens.... ]

[nrpi]

[ Roman you work in the kitchens. ]

OK fine.

post-fratricide deathtoll;

[betacuck]

put that candle down and stop pouring wax on your nipples in order to feel something sexually i'm coming over

text

[betacuck]

you haven't seen my old place yet
new place
new cabin old place
get your ass over here

[ There's more to it--there's always more to it--but it's a nice unassuming sentence before Roman starts beating Kendall over the head with the feelings they both love to avoid whenever possible. ]